M E R I D I A N M A G A Z I N E
Reaching Out to Others at Christmas
By C.S. Bezas
I set aside that which I usually write about (our young people and their needs) in a desire to share something for this Christmas season. As I do so, I am surrounded by twinkling lights, packages to wrap, jingle bells, fragrant dishes cooking in the oven.
These are just a few of my favorite smells and sights and sounds of the Christmas season. What are yours? And what are your best memories and traditions of this season, where we as a people joyfully celebrate the holy birth of the Christ child?
Whatever the traditions are, they are all wonderful things in and of themselves. Yet I am troubled. There are those who will not have the privilege of these sounds or smells or sights this Christmas. I was reminded of this today when I received an email from a friend with the following http://www.christmaswishmovie.com. The link takes you to a site with a touching movie clip that beautifully honors those who are not with us — faithful individuals who are far away overseas fighting a war we in the states can only imagine.
The heartache of families who are separated in this way must be tremendous. I cannot imagine the angst, for I do not have loved ones called up to serve in this way. I write of this not to bring up the politics of the situation. Not in the least. This is not the forum for that. I write of this because of a much more important reason.
I am troubled as to what to do with this knowledge of these families’ heartaches and yet the lack of mine in this regard. I know that I am most blessed: I have my family intact here in the States. We reunite at home each evening after the course of our daily activities. We’ve not heard the high-pitched scream of wounded comrades, the whine of a bullet that fortunately missed us, the hard percussion of terrifying explosions. No, we haven’t heard any of this, because we are currently safe (at least most of our Meridian readers are, I would expect).
I remember feeling the same astonishment at my good fortune while visiting Auschwitz in Poland with a chamber choir during my college days. Standing in the frigid January air, the cold biting through my thick moon boots and down parka, I stared at the firing wall where so many “dignitaries” had faced down Nazis and their machine guns. Only the doctors, city leaders, and other prominent citizens were allowed to die in this “dignified” fashion; the other Polish Jews, gypsies, and others who were deemed less desirable were gassed in the shower chambers.
Being the only church member in my choir, I couldn’t speak much to the other vocalists about the spirit I felt in that place. I knew I was standing on holy ground. I felt I was being told that the Lord recognized the suffering of these, His children, and the spirit spoke strongly of it while I was there.
Yet, I couldn’t figure out why I hadn’t been one of them. Why was I allowed to be born a United States citizen? Why not a Jew decades earlier? And why was my family eventually able to join the Church, thus having the restored gospel to help us as we worked out our daily challenges and problems?
It’s the same question I ask today. My life is one of ease compared to these valiant soldiers fighting for freedom on the other side of the planet. Why am I so fortunate to be here with my husband, Christmas foods cooking in the oven, my children laughing in the background? I’m not sure. But I do know this. Where much is given, much is expected (D&C 82:3).
Which brings me to the point of this “Christmas” article. Christmas is rather hollow when we forget the reason for its presence in our life. The Savior came to serve us, redeem us, and point us toward home. I must do the same within my own sphere of possibilities and influence.
Thus, I’ve come to the conclusion that it’s not so important whether or not I’ve been given quiet or peace at this point in my life. What matters is that I be about the business of sharing the peace I have been given with others. It is not too late this Christmas season. With this in mind, here are my conclusions on how to celebrate in ways that are significant. I would love to hear your thoughts, too.
1. Adopt a soldier. There are many organizations that work to help support those soldiers who are away from home. Loneliness does exist amongst these men and women. We are told to reach out to those who are less fortunate than we are (especially important this time of year). One suggestion would be to reach out with the abundance of our lives, whether that abundance comes in the form of packages, emails, letters, or cards to a distant soldier.
Do a simple search on Google for “adopt a soldier,” check out the credentials of the organization, and begin to make a difference in the life of another. This truly, at least in my mind, would fulfill the real purpose of the Christmas season — that of giving of oneself to another, especially during their most difficult moments.
2. Adopt a grandparent. Soldiers are not the only ones who are lonely this time of year. Many aged individuals have been “cast-away” into nursing homes and other agencies. And much to our chagrin (perhaps) if we ourselves don’t die, we, too, will be old one day. We then might know just what it feels like to sit in a small room with unpleasant “old people” odors with nary a visitor.
The scriptures say, “Fear not to do good… for whatsoever ye sow, that shall ye also reap; therefore, if ye sow good ye shall also reap good for your reward” (D&C 6:33). Thus, one possibility is to complete this final Christmas week by adopting a grandparent. Your children might learn more from your example than you may know (and years later you’ll be grateful they learned their lesson well, when they visit you in your old-folks home).
3. Adopt a family member. Is there a family member who is a pariah in your family, one who is avoided or despised because of mistakes? Yet we read in the scriptures of the rewards waiting for those who seek the lost sheep amongst us. Why not find the lost ones in your family this holiday season and quietly adopt them? They need you more than you may know. And in doing so, you will share the Christmas sentiment in far more meaningful fashion than a simple $15 gift bought at the local department store.
4. Adopt a ward member. I think we all know a few people in our individual wards that we’re reticent to talk to or socialize with. They might be different from us, or they’ve offended us, or they’ve “sinned” and we don’t want to associate with them. Whatever the case may be, the telling question at this point is, “What would the Savior do?” Why not silently adopt this person and for the next twelve months do some secret act of service for him? The results may astound you.
I’ve finally learned that it’s not productive to feel guilty when I don’t have certain trials that others do. Rather, I now have concluded that the Lord simply would have me be His hands and His heart for those who are facing stringent heartaches, regardless of what those may be. The soldiers shown in the mini-film link above are good examples of this.
The Christ child came to bring peace to a troubled world. I want to be part of that equation. So as I go about the final days of this Christmas season, I’m now searching my heart for promptings as to those within my midst who need my Christmas spirit manifested in thoughtful deeds, rather than just through my home’s colorful twinkling lights, shiny wrapped gifts, or yummy smells from my oven.
And may those waiting for you to come into their lives praise your name forever for finding them this 2006 Christmas season!
C.S. Bezas’ new book, Powerful Tips for Powerful Teachers has been called the perfect book for parents of teens and all those who work with them. It is available at local LDS bookstores and online at http://deseretbook.com/store/product?sku=4977585.