Dealing with Tardiness
By C.S. Bezas

Why do we teach seminary? Probably for a lot of reasons, but it all boils down to this: We as seminary teachers are to “provide weekday religious instruction for youth in grades nine through twelve. [We] also assist local priesthood leaders in encouraging youth to serve missions and marry in the temple” (CES Policy Manual, 15 April 2005, p. 1).

It is a joyous thing we do. It really is. Yet there are a few things that can quickly eat into that joy.  One of these things is that of tardy students. Just as termites can erode a structure, tardiness can do the same (amongst other things) to an otherwise beautiful seminary lesson.

Yet tardiness is something we can only influence as teachers. We do not have control over whether our students remembered to set the alarm clock the night before, whether their ride picks them up late, or whether they dallied driving to seminary. We may like to think that we as their teachers have control over these things, but when, as the saying goes, “push comes to shove,” we don’t. We can’t shove our kids into a pattern they are currently resisting or perhaps are not currently able to keep.

How wonderful it would be if we did have true control over these things. Then we could make sure every student entered the classroom quietly and early, so that when we were ready to start, we had a full class to teach to.

But the reality is that we can only influence these things. This, in many ways, is a microcosm of what our Heavenly Father experiences with us. He entices us to goodness, but He does not force us. Similarly, we can entice our students to goodness (aka “being on time to class), but we do not force them.

So what do we do if what we’ve done to encourage our students seems to fail? First of all, we may want to re-evaluate our definition of “fail.” Second, there are always additional ideas to help us work toward achieving worthwhile goals in the area of student promptness.

The Definition of “Fail”

Sometimes we feel we are failing when really we are not. If we only evaluated success by the numbers, even the heartiest of souls might faint when looking at the reality of the situation. “Oh, no,” we might exclaim, as we look at the number of tardies on the month’s roll. But so-called “failure” should not be so hastily judged.

According to Dictionary.com “fail” has a variety of definitions:

• To fall short of success or achievement in something expected
• To lose strength or vigor; become weak
• To break, bend, or crush
• To stop functioning

True, we could view everything through the lens of the first definition. But to do so potentially creates depression or could be considered quite short-sighted. Even if we’ve tried for weeks to help students come to class on time — and the numbers aren’t improving — we can still take hope. There may be a more accurate perspective.

If we viewed the situation with a broader vista, the end result might be quite different. Here are a few questions to help you analyze the situation if you’ve begun to feel as though you have failed in the area of student promptness:

• Have the students or ourselves lost strength or vigor or have become weaker because of our efforts to help them grow in appreciation of being prompt (second definition listed)? Probably not. If anything, by teaching true and high standards, we encourage growth. Although our students may not yet have achieved “perfection” in classroom promptness, they may very well still be growing towards that in other ways. Spiritual “creation” usually comes before the actual physical creation/manifestation.

• Have we crushed our students or tried to break them with discipline because they were late (the third definition listed above)? I would hope not. If this were the case, we might need to seek the Lord’s guidance and His viewpoint of the situation and how we’re handling it.

• Have the students stopped coming because of the pressure we’ve applied because of tardiness (in other words, stopped “functioning”, as in the fourth definition). I sincerely would hope not!

Worthwhile Goals

In the end, we do need the students to be in class on time. They need the spiritual uplift that rewards those who are obedient to that which has been asked of them — to be in their seats before class starts. But let us be balanced and inspired in our approaches with them over this matter.

The students need the spirit that comes during opening exercises, when we sing a hymn and hear a devotional and prayer offered by a student. But let us not be hasty nor be harsh in our opinions toward ourselves or our students if the students still currently struggle to arrive at seminary and be in their seats before seminary begins.

So what do we do — because the reality is, we need our students in their seats before class starts. The spirit simply feels stronger when we are united that way as a class. And whereas we need not feel like failures if our students are struggling with tardiness, we do need to lead them to understand that they are a very important part of their seminary experience and as such, they need to be here on time.

Each student has the responsibility to eliminate, when possible, the impediments to arriving in class on time. The local seminary leaders determine how to handle tardiness, should students not follow through on this. But most importantly, in our efforts to encourage promptness we should never overlook the needs of the students nor the sensitivity of their souls. Our business is to lead them to Christ, not to cause them to run away from the seminary experience because of our overzealousness.

Obviously, if tardiness gets out of hand, parents need to be advised and/or the bishop counseled so that help is provided the student (or perhaps the parents, who may not understand the essential nature of this). But let us always remember love first in this, and in all situations. Let us not get so hung up on policies that we forget the principles of what matters most.

Thus, as we set our goals for our seminary moments, establishing the goal of classroom promptness is a worthwhile endeavor. This can take skill to achieve that in a loving manner, that’s for sure! I received a number of suggestions from a variety of seminary teachers around the country. Thank you for those who wrote in. Here is a sampling of essential perspectives:

Readers’ Thoughts

We had a meeting before the seminary year started. I told [the students] that we would start at 6:45.  They asked, “When are we late?”  I said, "We start at 6:45."  Again they asked, "When are we late?"  And again I said, "We start at 6:45."  Finally, after the third time of them asking when are they late, I said, "6:46!" I have almost no tardiness. And most days we have opening prayer at 6:46. If they are tardy it isn't the same kids and it is not an everyday event.

I also told them that I would be there at 6:30, and they were welcome to come as early as they wanted. And if they beat me there then I would have to come earlier! So far they have only beaten me there a couple of times (and that was because my teenager was running behind). And I even have a couple that try to get there by 6:40 — just so we can visit beforehand.

I have really enjoyed this year's seminary experience.

Teri Grantham

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I had to chuckle at your question about tardy ideas.  We have tried many times to curb the tardiness.  Last year, we offered hot chocolate before class during the cold months, but I'm not sure what a difference it made. 

This year we tried to engrain being punctual from the beginning by stating in at least 3 classes that class began at 6.  We even gave tips to students on getting enough sleep and how to increase their energy in the morning, such as making sure they go to sleep and get up at the same time as much as possible, to drink water in the morning, the best position to fall asleep quickly in, not to nap for more than 30 minutes at a time during the day, and to eat breakfast.  We urged them to pray.  We haven't seen any noticeable improvement — yet.

It doesn't seem right to dive into the lesson before the hymn, devotional and opening prayer.  Sometimes I ask the kids to mark off their reading chart and scripture mastery charts during class.  Or I'll play a scripture mastery song over and over and get the kids who are there to sing along.  It gets them going and the ones who are there usually have no problem passing off the scripture mastery.  I've asked the students if the Spirit was prompting them to share an insight they gained from the day's reading assignment or from previous lesson. 

Thank you for your articles and insights.  We'll keep praying!

(Suggestion donated anonymously)

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We prefer to talk to the students personally and try to work out a solution.  However, if the infractions continue, then the students need to be aware that you will call home.

This worked very well last year with one of our young ladies.  She was a senior and really not tapped into the whole seminary idea.  I am not really sure why she attended, because Mom was rather nonchalant about attendance.  Both seminary teachers had spoken to her about her tardiness.  She still continually came late and disrupted class.  I made a call home.  Even though her mother made excuses for her, attendance did get a bit better. I wrote her a note of appreciation and support in this challenge for her.  I think it helps that the youth know we are on their side and understand their challenges and weaknesses.

I have had this backfire though — you really need to understand parents.  Another student, whose mother is a good friend, was struggling with attendance.  When I took it to her she blew up at her child and now he doesn't attend at all.  He is very mad at me for calling home.  I realize I am his excuse, but it has damaged a friendship and attendance for this young man.

I would love to know what others have done as I feel it is a fine line in determining what to do.  I must confess that I really feel like you have to have a policy right up front with the students so they know and understand the rules.  I personally do not think it a bad thing to have a strict policy where this is concerned.

Tricia

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Summary

The Lord loves our students. He understands their needs better than we can. He comprehends their challenges in all possible complexities. As stated previously, we are first and foremost to love our students and be there for them. But it is my opinion that in that love, we are also to set standards and expect the students to rise to them.

Here are a few final suggestions on dealing with tardy students, so that your lessons can be given to a full classroom, rather than just to a few stragglers:

1. It can be powerful for students to finally understand they have as much responsibility for their gospel learning as we do in teaching them. This knowledge will help them arrive in class on time and participate, if they are to take with them the spirit throughout the day.

2. We as their teachers are to start class on time, regardless of the amount of students who have arrived. If that means we sing the hymn by ourselves, so be it. As the students arrive, they will soon see the importance of being prompt by observing your example (offered in a kind way, not overbearing).

3. We are to love our students into action. We work to remember the phrase, “They never will care how much we know, until they know how much we care.” We love first in all things.

4. It is best to speak with a student one-on-one to better ascertain why tardiness is happening. As my husband’s MTC president used to say, “Information makes for better Inspiration.”

5. Know that when youth grasp the true “why” behind a standard, they are usually swift to accept that standard. It is important as teachers to pray to understand how to bequeath that understanding to our students and then to listen for the promptings that will come — and apply them in our service to these students.

6. When all else fails, speaking with the parent or the bishop may be needed.

Again, each situation is unique. What might work for my class may not work for yours. But whatever you come up, under the inspiration of the Holy Ghost, will help move both you and your students toward true success, both in starting class on time and in learning religious teachings and principles for all eternity. What an exciting purpose and task we have!

Watch for C.S. Bezas new book, Powerful Tips for Powerful Teachers: Helping Youth Find Their Spiritual Wings, available in LDS bookstores this month!