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The One Source
for Happiness
by
H. Wallace Goddard
It was always
nice to sit with my Dad and talk of the gospel, his favorite topic.
From time to time his words come back to me.
"Many decisions
are difficult because we are trying to justify a choice beneath
our highest standards."
The things
he taught become truer and truer, more and more meaningful as the
years pass. His wisdom was reaffirmed for me recently. A friend
called and asked for my advice. He told me of many years in a loveless
marriage. At work he has become friends with a wonderful woman with
whom he had beautiful gospel conversations. She was also in a loveless
marriage. Recently they had shared their feelings for each other:
They discovered that they were both very much attracted to each
other. "What should we do?" he asked me. The next day she called
me and asked the same question.
From the phone
conversations it was clear that both of them were ready to do almost
anything to open the way for their relationship. Both had begun
to think about ways the Lord might open the way for them. It was
also clear that both generally had garden-variety discontents in
their marriages. Neither was being destroyed. They were tired of
their current marriages.
My initial
questions to them may have seemed quite unrelated to their dilemma:
"Do you love the Lord Jesus Christ? Do you trust Him completely?
Do you know that He will always act in your best interest?" Affirmative
answers to these questions are very liberating. Submission to God
is the path to happiness.
And whoso
knocketh, to him will he open; . . . and save they shall cast
. . .away [learning, wisdom and riches], and consider themselves
fools before God, and come down in the depths of humility, he
will not open unto them. 2 Nephi 9:42
We often walk
away from sacred promises for alluring prospects. We turn our backs
on yesterday's impressions in order to grasp today's whims. We devalue
past joys as we lunge at prospective satisfactions. We reduce covenants
to mere options.
The veil obscures
our pre-mortal enrollments. In that heavenly setting long ago, many
of us may have signed up for advanced courses on long-suffering,
gentleness, meekness, and love. When we get to mortality, and the
challenging assignments almost overwhelm us, some of us quickly
drop classes. Stretching experiences surprise and discourage mortals
who have forgotten their long-term education and career goals.
Brigham Young
taught us boldly:
There is
no enjoyment, no happiness, no comfort, there is no light to my
path, for me there is no real pleasure or delight only
in the observance of truth as it comes from God, obeying it in
every sense of the word, and marching forward as a good faithful
soldier in the discharge of every duty. (Journal of Discourses,
Vol.19, pp.42-43, emphasis added)
Dishonor does
not lead to goodness. Wickedness never was happiness. The only path
to enduring peace is obedience. Working at our appointed station
doing the pick and shovel work of relationship-building may seem
unglamorous and unpromising. But those who are faithful in duty
will enjoy eternal rewards that are unimagined--even unimaginable--in
our mortal way of thinking. Even as we labor along, God will hum
hymns of comfort and joy to our souls. Duty and drudgery will be
burnished to a bright finish. There is consolation in growth.
I recommended
to both the man and the woman who called that they do everything
in their power to make their respective marriages work. After they
had done all they can, they still should pray for the Lord to provide
miracles to open further ways to bless their marriages. Only as
we honor our promises with our best efforts and heaven's help can
we expect to find happiness.
When we imagine
happiness to be in some exotic place outside our mundane commitments,
we will be everlastingly disappointed. When we chase happiness,
we will be frustrated. When we obey with full purpose of heart,
a peace beyond understanding distills upon us. Brigham Young gives
the example of Lyman Johnson who left his covenant obligations for
something that seemed more promising.
Lyman E. Johnson
said, at one of our Quorum meetings, after he had apostatized and
tried to put Joseph out of the way. . . . "Brethren--I will call
you brethren--I will tell you the truth. If I could believe `Mormonism'--it
is no matter whether it is true or not--but if I could believe `Mormonism'
as I did when I traveled with you and preached, if I possessed the
world I would give it. I would give anything, I would suffer my
right hand to be cut off, if I could believe it again. Then I was
full of joy and gladness. My dreams were pleasant. When I awoke
in the morning my spirit was cheerful. I was happy by day and by
night, full of peace and joy and thanksgiving. But now it is darkness,
pain, sorrow, misery in the extreme. I have never since seen a happy
moment.." (Journal of Discourses, Vol.19, p.42)
What a keen
irony! We often do something because it seems more promising in
our current mood--even though it may not be in total harmony with
the counsel of God and His servants. We imagine that we know better
than they or that unusual circumstances justify our desertion. For
example, we resolve to pay tithing after the bills are paid. We
determine that food storage is folly. We take on debt with disregard
for counsel and conscience. We minimize those parts of the Book
of Mormon that do not agree with our advanced educations or humanistic
philosophy.
O that cunning
plan of the evil one! O the vainness, and the frailties, and the
foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are
wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set
it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their
wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall
perish. (2 Nephi 9:28)
As I talked
to the woman who called about her relationship with her co-worker,
I saw a miracle. She originally called with the desperate sense
that she could not be happy without him; when I encouraged her to
honor her promises and entrust her happiness to God, she did not
resist. She embraced God as the only true source of happiness. She
trusted Him.
The miracle
grew--as it always does when we trust God. She called the next day
to report that she had gone home and apologized to her husband for
her coolness and unkindness. They had spent a joyous evening together--something
she had never imagined possible. Their marriage is not suddenly
idyllic, but there is hope.
And I will
also ease the burdens which are put upon your shoulders, that
even you cannot feel them upon your backs, even while you are
in bondage; and this will I do that ye may stand as witnesses
for me hereafter, and that ye may know of a surety that I, the
Lord God, do visit my people in their afflictions. (Mosiah 24:14)
There are,
of course, marriages that must end because of abuse or betrayal.
Those who need to end a damaging relationship have the right to
specific direction from heaven. But Satan would lead millions more
than the unavoidable ones out of their sacred promises by prospects
of something better, sweeter, or finer. But Satan is a liar. He
will "not support his children at the last day, but doth speedily
drag them down to hell" (Alma 30:60).
Satan weaves
elaborate fantasies to deceive us. He mixes mild discontent in our
current relationships together with idealization of a prospective
partners. Then he stirs in some hints of divine purpose and inspiration.
He is quite able to make preposterous options look wise and inspired.
There is always, however, some voice in us that protests: "Please
don't do this. Please don't dishonor your promises. Please don't
give in to the father of lies."
There is only
one Source of enduring happiness. When we act contrary to promises,
covenants, counsel, and impressions, we are acting contrary to the
nature of happiness.
For ye have
sought all the days of your lives for that which ye could not
obtain; and ye have sought for happiness in doing iniquity, which
thing is contrary to the nature of that righteousness which is
in our great and Eternal Head. (Helaman 13:38)
As Dad taught,
when we make up our minds to be obedient to the counsel of heaven,
we will find peace, joy, consolation. We will be happy. Forever.
God knows the path to Happiness. He will lead us there if we obey
Him.
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