Project in writing where you want to be
And what you want to have “brought to pass”
(in your family, in your work, in your personal life)
five years from now.

Then check through prayer against God’s blueprint
Adjust your goals (or refine them) from week to week
In this prayerful Sunday Session.
Reflect and ponder on how you will get to these goals
From where you are now
But be content with broad brush pictures
And conceptual images.
Stop short of the detailed, complex plans
That assume you know more than you really do
And block the way of both inspiration and discovery.
God often confirms the “what,”
And helps us with our aim as we pray.
Then, if we are spiritually sagacious,
He refines and adjusts the where, when and how
(and sometimes even adds to the what)
as we watch.

2.  Ask
We have already established asking
As the most repeated admonition of scripture
And as the key that unlocks blessings and guidance
Without violation of our agency.
Because of its power, we must be careful
In our asking.
“Beware of what you want,” the saying goes,
“For you will get it.”

And G.K. Chesterton said,
“By asking for pleasure, we lose the chief pleasure,
for the chief pleasure is surprise.”

But when asking is thoughtful,
And when it follows unselfish
Thanking,
It polishes us and pleases our Father
And prayer becomes sweet and delicious and
Hard-to-conclude.
Good askers are good listeners
And willing to watch and wait.

**

Prayer sometimes yields inspiration about what we can do to answer our own question or meet our own needs. One praying for a solution or answer might be spiritually directed to the scriptures and to a passage that contains the formula. One praying for material help might be inspired to go into a new field or look for a different kind of work.

Other times prayer is not the source of an answer or the channel by which we are guided to do something ourselves. Rather, it is the answer and brings about the change by itself without directing us to do anything!

Sometimes prayer is the source of power.

Sometimes it is the power.

Orson Hyde, sent by the prophet to open the Holy Land to the Gospel and to the fulfillment of latter-day prophecies, didn’t ask God how to do it as much as he asked God to do it. Instead of spending his time in the mental process of trying to figure out what needed to happen in the Holy Land or on the physical, political process of trying to change things there, he spent his effort in the spiritual process of asking God to make those changes. After a time he returned to the Prophet and reported not on what he had done but on what he had prayed for and on his faith in what God would bring to pass.

There are at least three very different types of prayer

In which God’s guidance is sought:

1. Prayer for change wrought by God —
   Where we ask God to bring to pass
   Things far beyond our own capacity or power.

2. Prayer for light — where we seek a clear mind,
   Insight, wisdom, true impressions and direction
   Toward correct decisions and God’s will —
   So that we can decide what to do
   And then do it.

3. Prayer for confirmation after we have made a decision
   And are requesting God’s approval
   Before we implement our decision.

**

3.  Seek Confirmation
Acknowledging the short limits of
Our understanding
We seek confirmation — the still, sure nod that says
“yes” —
to our “studied out” goals and decisions.
At this level, our prayers are true-false
Rather than multiple choice
And God’s promise (in the 9^th Section of the D & C)
Is of a yes (a burning or a calm knowing)
Or a no (a stupor of thought)
Confirmation, once received,
Is confidence,
Assurance and support in hard times…
And freedom from the plague of the second guess.

**

I knew the three-step process of “studying it out,” “making your own decision” and “taking the decision to the Lord for confirmation” taught in the ninth section of the Doctrine and Covenants. I had implemented it many times before, and had felt the calm, sweet sureness of knowing.

This time, however, nothing would come. I had been offered a presidential appointment to direct a once-a-decade White House conference. It dealt with a worthy subject (children and parents), it was a clear opportunity, and it would allow us to spend a year in our “other home” in Washington. It also seemed to open doors to other contributions we hoped to make Linda and I discussed it, talked to the children, and became collectively excited about a tentative decision to go.

But in prayer the confirmation didn’t come. I wanted it, I tried for it, I even tried to imagine that I had felt it. But if you’re not sure you’ve felt it — you haven’t.

We discussed it again, we couldn’t think of any negatives other than the inconvenience of a move back to Washington and the need to turn parts of our business over to others for a time.

Then we rationalized a little. Maybe it didn’t matter that much whether we accepted or declined. Maybe this wasn’t a stupor of thought we were getting but rather an “OK, fine, go ahead if you want to.”

We went ahead. It was one of those interesting decisions that wasn’t really wrong, but wasn’t really right either. Only a few weeks after our return to Washington, President Reagan was shot and his recovery, coupled with other factors, led him to de-emphasize the conference and re-direct most of its activity to the state level rather than the national level that I was assigned to direct.

We realized that there would have been ways in which we could have had the same experience without giving up as much as we did. I could have chaired the conference rather than being its full-time director. We had made a decision based on limited foresight and realized now that what had come to us in prayer was a stupor of thought, signaling the need to re-think, to take a different approach.

**

A stupor of thought is a signal
To start over.
Either the wrong fork has been taken, or
Something has been left out, a piece is missing somewhere.
Or perhaps the timing is wrong.
The stupor is the absence of the sureness
And is both as real and as valuable
As the confirmation which is (unless we give up)
Yet to come.

4. Develop the Attitude of “Nothingness”
G. K. Chesterton said, “It is impossible without humility
To enjoy anything — even pride.” He also said,
“If a man would make his world large,
he must make himself small.”
Indeed, we cannot fully appreciate God’s greatness
Or maximize the power and use of faith
Until we understand (or at least acknowledge)
Our own nothingness.

**

I had always loved the list of commandments or admonitions in Mosiah 4:12-16. They seemed to be telling me everything from how to keep my temper to what to teach my children (be filled with a love of God, grow in knowledge, live peaceably, do not suffer your children to transgress or quarrel, teach them to love and serve one another).

Then one day someone pointed out to me that this was not a list of admonitions but a list of promises. It was an itemizing of the gifts we would be given if we would follow one single commandment given in verse 11.

If we acknowledge and remember (and begin to understand the greatness of God and our own nothingness, then we will be of a mind and an attitude, of a nature and of a spirit that we will, automatically and naturally:

What a list of promises! As we try to understand the majesty of the Lord, to see in perspective the vastness of the gap between his light and ours, we will gain that calm, insightful condition of our spirit that precipitates the long list of blessings. This calm and humble attitude, this meekness, this awareness of God’s greatness and our nothingness, is a powerful pre-requisite to spiritual serendipity.

**

God wants us to know both how unlimited our potential is
and how far we have to go to reach it;
so that we can feel both the familiarity of closeness
and the awe of distance.
“Beware of professed Christians” said C.S. Lewis
“who possess insufficient awe of Christ.”
The phrase could perhaps only have been improved
By Elder Neal A. Maxwell who said,
“The more we ponder where we stand in relation to Christ
the more we realize that
we do not stand at all…
we only kneel.”

The “attitude of awe”
Is part of the recipe
For spiritual serendipity.

“Watching” for Guidance

(Four Suggestions for Developing the Art)

1.  Add to the Attitude
Regular serendipity requires sagacity
And an attitude of calm, interested watching.
Spiritual serendipity requires the addition of a higher
And deeper watching
Through a still, observant soul, and
Through the inner eye of the spirit.
For this higher realm, we need to see others’ needs,
And to develop and attitude
Wherein we not only try to see the little things
But try to see them as answers.

Once we have asked we must watch for unexpected answers
In unexpected forms.
Answers are sometimes found in silver linings,
And other times in the clouds themselves.

**

Taking off on a business flight one evening we flew west, up into a heavy cloud bank and toward the sunset. The deep gray was haloed by gold and the metaphor of “silver linings” passed through my mind. We entered the cloud and experienced some bouncing and buffeting. Then we burst through it directly into the yellow brilliance of the setting sun — high enough now that the sun had come back up.

t’s interesting, I thought, that the clouds that often dominate our vision are only vapors, while the silver lining is the reality of the sun.

**

The attitude that spurs spiritual serendipity
Not only causes us to look for silver linings,
But helps us understand that, despite appearances,
They are vaster and stronger by far
Than the clouds in front of them,
And are provided by the same source and force.
Ask as though everything depended on God
(because it does).
Watch as though everything depended on you
(because the answer may be right in front
or right inside of you).

2. Add Gratitude to Attitude (And Also Fasting)
Why would gratitude help us to watch?
Because gratitude is awareness of blessings!
The same perceptive inner-sight that reveals gratitude
For what has happened
Also reveals answers and guidance
In what is happening.

“Thankfulness” is perfect training for “watchfulness.”
One who sees the past’s blessings
Sees also the present’s answers and the future’s
Opportunities

Fasting,
A principle we usually think of in connection with asking
For blessings,
Can also be of great assistance in giving thanks
For blessings.
The 59^th section of the Doctrine and Covenants
(verses 14-16)
implies that when we fast with thanksgiving
and joyful hearts,
“fasting” can become a synonym for “rejoicing.”

Fasting sharpens our physical senses
And tunes in our spiritual senses, making us highly
Susceptible
to spiritual serendipity.

Paul gives us a similar message in Phil. 4:6-7
Where he says (at least in one interpretation)
That if, instead of being careful and detailed
In our own planning,
We make our requests known to God,
With thanksgiving,
We will have the peace of God in heart and mind
That gives serendipity to our spirits.

**

Many years ago, we started a Thanksgiving tradition in our family of listing our blessings. Before we sit down to turkey dinner, we make a list on a long roll of cash register paper of every blessing we can think of. Everyone in the family gets involved and we list everything from “a free country” to “indoor plumbing.”

After dinner, we have contests to see who can read the entire list in the shortest amount of time.

Each time we do it, we realize that gratitude is more than something we owe to God. It is a beautiful feeling. It is something we should summon and savor as a gift to ourselves.

**

3.  Record (and Remember) Nudges
When a nudge or impression touches our spirit
(sometimes just bushing gently across it)
the worst thing we can do is ignore it.
The second worst thing we can do is to forget it.
They often reach clarity only for an instant and then
Immediately
Begin to fade, dim and dissipate…
Unless we seize them and transfer them
Into our conscious mind
Where they can be held solid and clear.

**

The first time we moved to England our children were small and everything was an exciting adventure to them. When we returned for our second stay, we had teenagers — who added whole new levels to the concept of homesickness.

Just a week after we arrived, and before homesickness began, I was running an errand to the shops with our fifteen-year-old and felt a clear “nudge” to talk with her about the homesickness that would probably set in after the excitement wore off. It was clear to me for a moment just how to explain certain things — just what to say to prepare her and soften the blow. But we were nearing the shops, so I decided to wait and discuss it later.

A half hour later, on the way home, I brought up the concept of homesickness, but the clear insight into how to explain it and prepare her for it was gone.

Several days later, when the symptoms had arrived in force, we talked again (I talked, she sobbed) and I was able to explain some of what I should have explained earlier. As I did, I realized how much more good it would have done if I had followed the first nudge when it came.

**

Learn to recognize impressions that come from the spirit
And categorize them not with imagination, superstition,
Or chanc
but with inspiration and insight.

Focus on nudges and remember them.
If possible, act on them immediately.
If not, capture them by writing them down.
As you write, they will expand and become more clear.
Writing can be thought of as the “tuning in”
That makes a faint signal
Audible and understandable.

4. Use Split Page Planning with “Nudge Notes”
When a spiritual impression comes,
It may not be something you can do immediately but
Something you should do at a certain time,
Or someone you should see,
Or something you should say.
The best place to make notes on these nudges
Is in a date book
So that you commit yourself to a specific time
On a particular day
(and since impressions fade fast if not written immediately,
a pocket datebook is the surest capture).
Other impression may come in the form of broader, longer range ideas
Which can be implemented over time;
Or in the form of new insights
Which have no particular or immediate application
But bear remembering.

These longer range impressions also need to be captured in writing.
When they are not written down, they are loose
And somehow “soluble”…they dissolve and disappear.

Both short and long range nudges can best be recorded
With the “split page planning” described earlier in this column.
Impression that dictate action can be committed to
By an entry on a particular day
(“scheduled” on the left hand side).
Broader ideas and insights from the same source can be
Captured (and expanded)
In the form of notes on the right hand side.
Whatever kind of datebook you use can be turned into
A split-page “anti-planner” by the simple addition of a
Vertical line to divide each day.
During Sunday Sessions, have a
Flip-through review of the week just passed.
Pay special attention to any “nudge notes” on the
Right hand side of each day.
Think about how they can be implemented in the future.

Summary

This column has tried, through words and images,
To suggest the formula or recipe
For calmness,
For watching,
For sagacity, and for peaceful, thoughtful prayer.
But there is a far better statement
Of the necessary ingredients of serendipity,
Far more beautiful,
Far more clear, filled with perfect images and feelings.

The best way you could follow up os these ideas on Serendipity
Is to set it aside the column
And read instead from The Book.

Jesus’ Sermon on the Mount has an almost infinite number
Of messages and light-giving interpretations.
One such message comes from reading the Sermon
As an explanation and set of directions
Of and for serendipity of the spirit.
Read and feel some of the messages and
See
How they point us toward the attitudes this column has

Tried to describe.

1. Build your house on a rock — seek treasures in heaven.
   Build your life
   On strong, righteous goals,
   But once they are set…

2. Take less thought for the morrow — don’t try to plan
   Everything.
   Be more like the lilies
   Of the field, the birds in the air — spontaneous, sensitive
   Flexible.

3. The light of the body is the eye — see and watch
   And be filled with light —
   Ye are the light of the world.

4. Ask, know, and answers will open —
   Look for those answers and accept them,
   Even if they come in unexpected forms.

5. Do not anger or lust — control the mind
   And think purely and deeply.

6. Turn your other cheek — give your cloak — love enemies.
   Instead of judging, strive to see and understand.

7. Fast in secret, pray in closet, let not the left hand
   See what the right hand gives — have pure,
   Inner motives.

8. Rejoice — even in adversity —
   Relish and welcome surprises
   And unexpected turns of all kinds.

9. Don’t let salt lose its savor —
   Don’t let life get boring — keep your freshness
   And spontaneity.

10. Be perfect — or at least develop the
    Perfect attitude
    Of receptivity, acceptance, awareness and peace;
    Record and remember and implement every nudge the
    Spirit gives.

Perhaps it is though something like spiritual serendipity
That the meek inherit the earth, and
That the humble in spirit see the Kingdom of God.
Read the greatest Sermon again,
Directly from its source in Matthew’s
5^th, 6^th, and 7^th chapters.
Read it as a recipe for spiritual serendipity
And re-discover its peaceful wisdom.

Afterword

This part of the column (the Serendipity part) wants to end
As it began — with promises.
Hopefully we have made a circle with captures
The ideas necessary
To make the promises look more accessible in the afterword
Than they did in the foreword.
So think for a moment about the applications
Of spiritual serendipity —
About the benefits that come from being
Watchful and prayerful
And using the resulting calm, receptive serendipity
In each facet of our lives.

1. In our work

Spiritual serendipity relaxes us, reduces stress;
Helps us find adventure in the day-to-day possibilities
And opportunity in the small unexpected.
It lets us stop pushing and forcing and
Lets us start seeing creative solutions and
lateral thinking approaches.
Even if your work is, by nature, very routine,
Spiritual serendipity will allow you to see and appreciate
People and things that make each day more interesting.

**

I once had a business associate who wrote me a letter containing his philosophy: “Try never to be surprised. If you are surprised, it shows you’re not a very good anticipator or planner and your business life will be unpredictable and constantly upsetting. Act, don’t re-act because we’re all judged by what we make happen. Learn to control the people and things around you.”

I recently sent him a carefully worded alternative approach: “Try to find surprises every day. If you’re never surprised it shows you’re not a very good watcher and your business life will be dull and consistently boring. Learn to respond as well as to act, because the very measure of our mortality is how we respond to the things that happen to us. Learn to control yourself.”

**

2. In our families
Spiritual serendipity helps us see our spouses and children
More clearly and more individually
So we can spot their needs and
Share their joys.
It also helps us keep the energy of humor
And the excitement of flexibility and fun…
And it reminds us that our priorities are our children,
Not our plans.

**

The “plan” was an early dinner to allow time for a family night activity before the younger children’s bedtime. But one older boy was late getting home because he’d had to start over on his crafts project at school — which was due tomorrow.

It would have been easy to get mad at him except for his look of excitement and pride. He’d learned to use the band saw. It was so exciting that he’d cut his piece of wood after making only one quick measurement, ruined his project and had to start over. This time everything worked out fine, except that re-doing the project made him two hours late getting home.

Our late dinner was spent in a discussion that applied the principle of “measure twice, build once” to many different aspects of life. Then, since it was late, we all went and ice cream in our pajamas. Nothing went as planned, yet everything turned out better.

**

3.  In the Church
Spiritual serendipity makes us more people oriented,
Less programoriented.
Sensitivity and receptivity to the Spirit’s impressions
Causes us to serve better and strengthens our testimonies.

**

Irritation was the initial impulse when I called and filed for the third time to get an appointment with my last home teaching family. “Oh, we’re sorry, I know it’s the last day of the month by Jimmy’s in his school play and we just have to be there.”

Then I took a second, more serendipitous look at the situation. I bought a ticket for Jimmy’s play, watched the first act, and spent the intermission talking to Jimmy’s parents about their pride in their son. They also mentioned certain worries they had about him that would have never come up in a normal, formal visit.

**

4. In leisure and play
With spiritual serendipity
There is always something to do
Even when there’s nothing to do.
We see more possibilities, challenges, options,
Feel more interests and emotions,
And live longer in the same amount of time.

**

A gorgeous Saturday, until you look at the calendar, April 15 — income tax day. Still, if I can finish it during the day we can all go out to a movie tonight.

But what a day, what a fresh steady breeze, and what an idea from the six-and-eight-year-olds who see kits flying as the ultimate fun.

Figures can be written and subtracted and added after dark, but kites can’t be flown. What a day, what a sight to watch the children’s eyes dance like their kites, and what a warm memory to carry me though the dark late hours of figuring income tax. (Luckily the post office stayed open until midnight.)

**

There are a lot of applications of spiritual serendipity —
A lot of reasons for wanting the quality
But the reasons all telescope, umbrella, and fold down
Into one word and one reason:
Into one word and one reason:

Spiritual serendipity is a path
Along the unending, ever climbing ridge
Of joy.

Next week we will turn our attention to the Second Alternative —.to the attitude that can replace the error of “Ownership.”  This is the Alternative of STEWARDSHIP.