M E R I D I A N     M A G A Z I N E

More on the Trip to Serendip
By Richard Eyre

Editor's note: If there is enough interest, there may be a chance of securing a batch of Richard’s Serendipity of the Spirit at half price for Meridian Readers (this is the book he wrote in Serendip (Sri Lanka) that he referred to last week, and it actually contains a full translation of the original “Three Princes of Serendip” fable. See the note at the end of the column for instructions on how to express your interest.

Serendipity: The Origin of my Interest

I enjoyed telling you, last week, about my odyssey to Sri Lanka in pursuit of Serendipity click here to read that column if you missed it. This week, let me continue on with an in-depth probe of what Serendipity is and how we can find more of it in our lives.

The Coining of the Word by Horace Walpole

A good first step in trying to grasp the concept of Serendipity is to explore the word itself, its origin, and its definition. And to do that, we need first to go back more than 250 years to an English author named Horace Walpole — the man who coined or invented the word.

Walpole, in a letter written in 1754 to Horace Mann, commented on his attraction to The Three Princes of Serendip.

They were always making discoveries, by accidents and by sagacity, of things of value that they were not in quest of.

What kind of man was this Walpole? Did his interest in the concept of serendipity and his intrigue with a fanciful fable called The Three Princes of Serendip spring from the kind of person he was?

Walpole was born in 1717, the son of Sir Robert Walpole (who would later become England’s prime minister). He grew up a son of privilege and leisure, a product of Eton and Kings College, Cambridge. Leaving the university, he set out on a two-and-a-half year tour of France. While he was broad, his father had him elected to Parliament. His life was the epitome of the blessings of noble birth in 18th century England, but Walpole seemed to derive productivity and widespread interests from his privilege rather than complacency and laziness. Antiquary, novelist, politician, poet-master, social charmer, architect, gardener, and political chronicler all became his appropriate descriptions.

Always appreciative of the unique and unpredictable, he designed and built a gothic castle in which he lived and wrote. His environment inspired mysterious stories of romance and intrigue that made him into what some call “the father of the Gothic novel” and influenced the writing of Scott, Byron, Keats and Coleridge. His insightful and voluminous letters and correspondence give us the clearest picture we have of the social and political life of England’s 18th century.

In his book on Writers and Their Work, Hugh Honour called Walpole “one of the most delightful characters who ever put pen to paper. He knew everyone worth knowing in his elegant age. He had a substantial passion for antiquities, architecture, printing, letter-writing — everything that could enhance the pleasures of life.”

You and I may not have much in common with this man who was born into wealth and position, but he had a freshness that we can all admire, and knowing a little about his nature is helpful in understanding the word he coined.

Macualay said that “Walpole rejected, with gay abandon, whatever appeared dull, while retaining only what was in itself amusing of could be made so by the artifice of his diction.” James Boswell spoke of “Harry’s constitutional tranquility or affection of it.” Gilly Williams, who knew him from boyhood, said, “I can figure no being happier than Harry. Mostrari digito praetereuntium (“to be pointed out by the finger of those passing by”) has been his whole aim. For this he has written, printed, and built.”

Thackery who, like many, felt that Walpole’s correspondence was his greatest legacy and contribution, said, “Nothing can be more charming than Horace’s letters. Fiddles sing all through them: wax lights, fine dresses, fine jokes, fine plates glitter and sparkle. There never was such a brilliant, jiggling, smirking Vanity Fair as that through which he leads us.”

What was it about Walpole that gave him his tranquility, or his happiness, or his gift of seeing life as a graphic, sparkling, exciting adventure? Was it an attitude — an attitude he already had and for which he found a name when he read the fable of the three princes?

As interesting as the descriptions of Walpole by friends might be, his own words and self-description carry even more insight. A few examples:

I have papers to sort; I have letters and books to write; I have my prints to past, my house to build, and everything in the world to tell posterity — how am I to find time for all this?

I love to communicate my satisfactions. My melancholy I generally shut up in my own breast.

This world is a comedy to those that think, and a tragedy to those that feel.

In short, the true definition of me is that I am dancing senator — not that I do dance, or do anything by being a senator; but I got to balls and to the House of Commons — to look on, and you will believe me when I tell you that I really think the former is the more serious occupation of the two: at least the performers are more in earnest.

What should we gain by triumph (over the colonists)? Would America laid waste, deluged with blood, plundered and enslaved replace America flourishing, rich, and free?

This man, then, who seemed interested in everything, who loved fun and spontaneity, who was open and candid about his own feelings and weaknesses, who was part cynic, part political critic, part romanticist, and who was always trying to discover what was inside of himself as well as the world around him — this man coined the word serendipity. The concept of happy accidents and good things discovered through awareness and sagacity appealed to him because so much interested him and because life held such adventure and intrigue for him.

Perhaps the most revealing of all Walpole’s self-insights was the occasion when he tried to see himself through the eyes on one Reverend Mr. Steward, a fellow guest at the country home of the Earl of Hartford.

Strolling about the house, he saw me first sitting on the pavement of the lumber room with Louis, all over cobwebs and dirt and mortar; then found me in his own room on a ladder writing on a picture; and half an hour afterwards lying on the grass in the court with the dogs and the children, in my slippers and without my hat. He had some doubt whether I was the painter or the workman from the factory or the tutor for the family’s children; but you would have died at his surprise when he saw me walk into dinner dress and sit by Lady Hartford. Lord Lyttelton was there and the conversation turned to literature. Finding me not quite ignorant added to the Reverend’s wonder; but when he saw me go to romps and jumping with the two boys, he could stand it no longer and begged to know who and what sort of man I really was, for he had never met with anything of the kind.

It appears that Walpole cultivated an attitude of awareness, spontaneity, and joy; and that he relished the unexpected, the happy discoveries and surprises of life. Perhaps he found slight frustration in the fact that there was no word to describe the attitude or quality that he most valued.

Then he came upon an ancient Persian fable called The Three Princes of Serendip. In the story he found a clear expression of his attitude and in the title he found the root for a new word.

The Three Princes of Serendip — an Ancient Persian Fable

There is not enough space in this column to actually tell the fable (a full translation of it appears in the book I am going to try to make available to Meridian readers, however). So for now, let me just summarize the fable by saying that it is the tale of Three Princes who go out into the world to seek their fortunes.

None of them finds a fortune, but each of them finds something better than a fortune. One finds love, one loyalty, and one great service — and all find relationships and causes of importance and joy. They find these unexpected things (things that are better than what they were seeking) because of their awareness, their sensitivity, and their sagacity. They notice things that others miss. They are interested in things around them, and thus they find opportunities and friendships and other joys that less aware and sensitive people do not even see.

Walpole fell in love with the fable, and essentially said “We don’t have a word in our English language that expresses this phenomenon … of people who are looking for one thing, but find something better than that which they were seeking because of their awareness and sensitivity.”

Walpole essentially said “I’m an author, I will make up a new word to express this delightful concept, and since it comes from the Three Princes of Serendip, I will call it serendipity.”

What the Word can mean Today

Now that we know a little about serendipity’s past — the person (Walpole) and the fable (The Three Princes) that are responsible for the word — it is time to move to the present. What is serendipity today? How does it work now?

All good explanations involve definitions of terms and stories or experiences to illustrate. So we will begin there, and then move to some practical suggestions on how to gain the quality, and how to use it.

Let’s start with the kind of serendipity that is both generated and received by the mind and by the five senses that the mind commands. This first level (without the spiritual overlay) we will call “Regular Serendipity.” We will get to “Spiritual Serendipity” a little later.

Definitions of Terms
(the words that define the word)

“Serendipity,” says a current Webster’s dictionary, is: “The making of pleasant discoveries by accident, the knack of doing this.”

Walpole would not have been completely satisfied with Webster’s definition! After reading “The Three Princes” he wanted a word that meant more than luck or accident. He wanted a word that celebrated life’s sometimes happy unpredictability, but he also wanted a word that recognized the fact that luck comes most frequently to those who are aware, concerned, and wise. He decided to coin a new word, a noun with an adjective form, that would represent the universal meaning contained in the experiences of the princes of Serendip. “Serendipity” was defined by Walpole as “that quality of mind which, through sagacity and good fortune, allows one to frequently discover something good while seeking something else.”

“Serendipitous” is the adjective form. A serendipitous experience is one of unexpected happy discovery, and a serendipitous person is one who makes such discoveries frequently.

“Sagacity” says the dictionary, is “wisdom in one’s understanding and judgment of things; awareness and insight springing both from education and form alertness.”

Sagacity, then, requires us to be both informed and aware; alert, sensitive, and empathetic.

Just as it has been said that luck favors the prepared, it could be said that serendipity favors the sagacious or the aware.

“Sensual awareness” can be defined as alertness and effective use of the five senses. Each of our senses can be developed — fine tuned so they present us with more beauty as well as more information, more opportunities and insight as well as more data. When we concentrate only on the task at hand, on the schedule, routine, or plan of the day, we are like the plow horse with blinders on who sees only the straight furrow ahead of him. But when we focus on what is happening as well as what we are doing — and on what is around us and in us — we being to be as aware of the feelings in our heart as we are the plans in our minds.

As Mission President in Southern England, I came to appreciate awareness and the thin line between awareness of the sense and awareness of the spirit.

Driving through a small town one day I saw a blind man selling his handmade baskets by the side of the road. Stopping to talk and get acquainted, I must have unconsciously exhibited some pity in my tone of voice. The man, who had introduced himself as “George,” stopped me. “Don’t pity me,” he said. “I won’t have it. You have one sense that works better than mine, but I have four senses that work better than yours because I have developed them.”

Some weeks later, as I baptized George, I asked him when he first knew the Gospel was true. “The first time I walked into the church, he said, “and felt the spirit that was there.”

“Mental awareness” refers to both our education and our insights — our accumulated understanding and perspectives as well as our alertness and vigilance, and our ability to be in the world and aware of the world in the most positive sense (which does not require us to be “of the world”).

“Good fortune,” says Webster, is “luck; good things that happen without work or effort.”

Again Walpole wouldn’t have been entirely happy with Webster. Walpole thought that serendipity could be obtained in greater frequency by developing both sagacity and good fortune. Good fortune, then, in his mind, was an attitude of faith and optimism — and attitude allowing one to see the bright, opportunistic side of unexpected occurrences — a love and an appreciation for surprises rather than a resentment of them.

Indeed, it is possible to expect the unexpected, to admit that life is unpredictable and that we control only a very small number of the variables, and then to decide to look for the positive interpretation or “bright side” of everything that happens. This, in Walpole’s mind, would constitute the attitude of good fortune.

“Goals” can best be defined as “mental pictures of things as we want them to be.” Goals are an essential part of serendipity. The third requirement set forth by Walpole, after sagacity and good fortune, was to be “seeking something.” Serendipity happens when we discover something good while seeking something else.

It is when we couple awareness and sagacity with purpose and goals that we create the atmosphere and attitudes within which serendipity can flourish.

Although serendipity is helped by goals and direction, it is hindered by the heavy, over-structured plans and highly detailed lists and schedules that absorb all of our awareness, sucking us away from the opportunities and surprises of the present.

“Quality of life” refers to the joy and fulfillment-level of our everyday living. It does not result from material possessions or external life style. Quality of life results form a quality of the temperament and of the soul which this book calls serendipity.

“Bridge I” reflects the idea that serendipity is a bridge. The metaphor applies in many ways. The first application is that serendipity is a bridge between structure and spontaneity, between discipline and flexibility, between expected and unexpected, between plans and surprises, and between the forced and the fun. The second application (Bridge II) applies to spiritual serendipity and will be explained in the latter part of this column.

Serendipity Bridge

I think that Serendipity can become a sort of bridge between regions that are otherwise hostile towards each other — lands that, without the “serendipity bridge,” we have to choose between because the gap between then is so wide.

One is the land of structure and discipline, of goal-setting, positive mental attitude, and achievement. It seems to be inhabited mostly by high-powered business executives, aspiring yuppies, left-brain thinkers, and super-moms. The other is the land of spontaneity and flexibility, of sensitivity, observation, and relationships. Here we find many artists and creative thinkers, philosophers and would be “Renaissance men,” and people who use the intuitive right hemisphere of their brains.

People in one land travel in jet planes, power yachts, and snowmobiles. In the other land, many prefer hot-air balloons, sailboats, and cross-country skis.

Although there are overlaps, we generally associate people in each land with certain things. In the first land, people read the Wall Street Journal, dress for success, and listen to motivational tapes. In the second land, people read poetry, dress for comfort, and listen to Stravinsky. In “land A” politics mean power, progress, military strength, and tax loopholes. In “land B” politics means environmental conservation and compassion. In one land people live to work and say things like, “Act, don’t react” and “Don’t jus t sit there, do something.” In the other land, people work and live and say things like “Go with the flow” and “Don’t just do something, sit there.”

The problem most of us have is that we like both lands — and we like lots of the people in both lands. And there are certain parts of us that we know belong in each land. We recognize that each of the two has its own unique beauty and usefulness. We also know that we appreciate one all the more after we have spent time in the other — like going from the snow in Colorado to a beach in California.

It is serendipity that allows us to move freely back and forth — even to have a home in each land.

Remember that serendipity requires sensitivity and highly tuned observation so that we don’t miss things like beauty, needs, opportunities, and spontaneous moments. If we have this sensitivity and it we have clear goals and objective (because serendipity only “finds something good” when “seeking something else”), then we have the passport and the visa that lets us spend all the time we want in both lands.

With serendipity we can live comfortably in “land A” because we are “seeking things” — we have goals; we want to achieve, to grow, to progress. But we can also feel at home in “land B” because we have sensitivity and sagacity and are, therefore, flexible and spontaneous enough to change our minds and change our course when the right moment or the right need or the right surprise comes into view.

People who have built the bridge of serendipity can find real fulfillment in meeting a goal, in checking off things on their “to do” list, in competing and in winning. But they can also feel the joy of a red sunset, of doing a spur-of-the-moment anonymous good turn, of writing a poem, or of winning a smile from a small child.

Serendipity is a bridge that lets us have our cake and eat it too. We don’t have to choose between being structured schedulers or flexible free-lancers. We can have both goals and surprises, both plans and spontaneity, both discipline and flexibility. We can ride in jet planes and hot air balloons.

Serendipity

Is not a compromise or a mid-point between
Structure and spontaneity.
It is a frame of mind that lets a person have more of both
Than he could have of either.

Setting goals, with an accompanying determination
To stay flexible and
To keep looking for something better
Reveals short cuts to the goals one has set
As often as it reveals better goals.

The sources as well as the benefits
Of regular serendipity
Are physical, mental, social, and emotional.

Physical serendipity involves intense use
Of the five senses
And yields greater beauty observed,
Adventure,
And the registration of more pleasure and joy, through
What eyes see, ears hear, senses sense.

Mental serendipity trains both the brain’s hemispheres
To gather and to value knowledge
And results in understanding,
Joyous openings of truth and insight,
And eventually…real wisdom.

Social serendipity makes us see all people as interesting,
Helps us watch for chance meetings, chances to learn,
Chances to give,
And puts into our hands the joy stick of friends everywhere
Even in places we’ve never been.

Emotional serendipity
Lets us become fascinated with (rather than resentful of)
Our own moods.
We observe our depression, pensiveness, even our fear
And find within them insight and dept.

In all cases, serendipity involves a certain combination
Of awareness, observation, acceptance, and optimism
That lets us find the best in
Whoever we are with,
Whatever is going on,
Wherever we are,
Whenever we are living, and
However we are feeling. In all cases we are
Finding and flowing
Instead of forcing and fighting

Scientists, explorers, and inventors tell us
Their discoveries come in one of two ways:

1. In solitary periods of private, penetrating, almost painful thought.
2. In burst of insight that come not out of analysis but out of observation or out of incidental conversation or — out of nowhere.

It is the same with our discoveries
About ourselves, and
About life.
They come to us either through deep, free though
Or through observation and awareness…
All of which are destroyed
By trying to control everything,
By excessive and exaggerated “positive mental attitude,”
By forcing the issue, by frantic activity, and
By “planning every minute.”

Learning the Lesson

I learned the lesson of serendipity as a young man during one compressed four-year period of my life. The year that preceded my church mission was aimless. As I anticipated the discipline and difficulty of a mission, I thought I owed myself a little relaxation. It wasn’t that I was lazy. I kept late hours and worked long and hard at things like dating, playing tennis, and having fun. I studied once in a while when I could find nothing else to do.

The results of the year were one fairly ill-prepared missionary, a certain amount of diversified experience, and a college grade point average that required three years of post-mission A’s to become respectable.

During my mission I made up for the playfulness. I developed a “positive mental attitude,” set a dozen or so specific goals every week, and planned every minute of every day and most of every night. Because of the Lord’s help, and because a mission — by its single-purpose nature — lends itself to this approach, I managed to do some good and have quite a wonderful experience.

I came home determined to apply everything I had learned to life. In that first year following my mission, I set high goals, made detailed plans, and attempted to shut out anything that fell outside of my plans. I tried hard to force life to work out the way I wanted it, and to reach my own objectives even if I had to step on a few people to do so. Since I saw only what I wanted to see, I was quite happy — that is, until finally someone (it happened to be the girl I was dating) pointed out that I was insensitive, self-centered, rigidly structured, obsessed and selfish, not to mention un-spontaneous and un-fun.

By sheer coincidence (or maybe by serendipity) our last date (the one on which she unloaded) was to a concert given by the Serendipity Singers. I had no idea what the word meant, but the next day, sitting in the library and still reeling from my chastisement, I happened to look the word up in an old dictionary. The definition fascinated me. “The ability, through sagacity, sensitivity, and spontaneity to find something good while looking for something else.” I saw the concept as a bridge between the objectives, structure, and high achievement pattern (which I’d learned on my mission and wasn’t about to give up) and the fun, flexibility, and light-heartedness that I had apparently lost.

I made the word my motto.

The Problem of Balance

While we talk more and more about the problem of balance, we keep getting offered the same old tired “cures” of positive mental attitude and time management. So many people carry both to excess. Positive mental attitude starts to mean “controlling everything” and time management starts to mean “making longer and longer lists and trying to do more and more things.”
Serendipity is an alternative attitude. It involves being positive and having goals, but it also involves flexibility, spontaneity, sensitivity, and the relish of surprise.

The Source
(You)

Whence cometh serendipity?
From ourselves!
It is a quality and a gift
That can be given only by ourselves
And only to ourselves.
We give it by teaching ourselves to watch and think,
To look for beauty, ideas, relationships,
To relish the unexpected…
To welcome surprises as opportunities,
Even if they delay or alter (and sometimes replace)
The goals we have thoughtfully set and diligently pursued.

Regular serendipity is a translucent, rose-colored umbrella
That over arches –
Our physical, mental, social, and emotional lives,
Making them dynamic, and allowing each part of us
To see happily
Through rain or shine.

Serendipity is an infrared, wide-angle lens that lets us
See more
And see each part clear, and bright, and light,
Even in night.

The Process
(of gaining the quality)

The development of serendipity
Is not merely a mental process
(like learning a new memory technique)
Or a physical process (like muscle conditioning).
Rather, it is the adopting of an attitude
Of thoughtfulness and watchfulness
That physically slows us up,
Emotionally calms us down,
Socially opens us out,
And mentally opens us in.

An Exercise in Serendipity

During my mission presidency, President Kimball came to London and we were asked to meet his plane and take him to his hotel. The late flight arrived at the end of a long Heathrow concourse in the still of the night. President Kimball, in his 80’s, was tired and jet-lagged, yet I saw in his eyes, his words, and his embrace, an awareness, a concern.

Walking down the concourse with the President and his personal secretary, Arthur Haycock, I noticed that the President’s briefcase had a broken hasp and sagged open. I walked a half step behind, ready to retrieve anything that might fall out. Then Brother Haycock noticed the problem and took action, dramatically pulling off his belt and fastening it around the briefcase. President Kimball watched, with a twinkle in his eye, and said, “Thank you, Arthur, but are you sure we don’t now have a more serious problem?”

Further down the concourse, unexpectedly, stood twelve new missionaries — easy to recognize — delayed en route to France. Without hesitation, President Kimball made a beeline for them, folding each into a warm hug of blessing and best wishes.

Finally we emerged to the waiting chauffeur-driven Rolls Royce limousine I had borrowed in an attempt to increase his comfort and to signify the respect of the British saints. I worried now that he would think it pretentious and out of place, but he climbed in without a word. As we drove down the dark motorway toward London, President Kimball stirred, stood, and reached to put his hand on the shoulder of the professional chauffeur who came with the car. “Young man,” President Kimball said, “I’m very sorry if we are keeping you away from your family this evening.”

The Prophet didn’t focus on the majestic car,
Or on hurrying to his hotel, or his own fatigue.
What he saw were the needs,
The people, the opportunities, and even the humor of
The evening.
None were planned or scheduled; all were beautiful
And joyful.
All were Serendipity!

I worked in the Honolulu International Airport as a ticket and baggage agent one summer between college years. I un-boarded hundreds of flights filled mostly with senior citizens who, at least to my youthful eyes, looked far too old to enjoy what was for most of them a “first fling.”

I used to listen to their comments as they deplaned: “Well, Martha, we’re finally here. We’ve waited 40 years for this.” Or “I’m not even tired any more, let’s get out and start having fun.”

Fun, says serendipity, is not something you do after you’ve completed the requirements of “normal life.” Real fun and real joy are elements of the every day and rewards for the observer who discovers them as he goes.

If you’re a list-maker
Make your list (or write your schedule) on the left
Side of your page. Draw a line down the center and
Leave the right side blank
To jot down the day’s serendipity after it happens
(a new acquaintance, a fresh idea, a child’s question,
An unexpected opportunity, a friend’s need,
A chance meeting, a beautiful sunset).
For fun, at the end of the week,
Look back on the lefts and rights of your days and discover
That what “just happened” on the unknown right
Is often more valuable than
What you made happen on the known left.

After my initial discovery of the idea of serendipity, I continued to use a rather bulky and detailed “day timer” scheduling book. Then one day it occurred to me that too much detail in planning was making me less receptive to the kind of awareness and sagacity I was seeking. It was at about that time that I made the following observations in my journal:

Too much planning can make the actual experience of living almost anti-climactic. (There may be times for reading the script, but it’s never as exciting as ad-libbing).

Too much thinking about something removes us from it — we become observers, analysts, spectators, or critics rather than participants.

If we can approach life more as an experience which contains vast variety and infinite potential for surprise, we will find ourselves dealing less with “success” and “failure” and more with progress and growth.

If we have to think about every detail of our lives, we ought to think about them after they have been lived (when we can learn from experience) not before and during (when the very thought may intercept or alter the experience).

Approaching life as an experience makes us, moment-to-moment, more aware of what is happening and of what we are feeling – and less aware of what we plan to have happen or wish had happened. Thus we see the opportunities we could never have planned and realize far more serendipity that we otherwise could.

It is not goals that get in the way of experience or serendipity — it is rigid plans.

Goals can coexist with experience — they can shine like beacons and allow us to see our experiences more clearly in their order and light.

Since the time that I made these observations, I have tried to do what I called “picturing” instead of planning. I write down my goals, especially when I feel al spiritual confirmation of their “rightness,” and I write down what I think I might have to do to reach them.

I continue to use the “left side” of my date book pages to keep track of appointments and schedules, but I am committed to “right side” serendipity and to regular Sunday sessions to re-evaluate where I am going and what alternative routes there may be to get there. One day, in my journal, I tried to put my new approach into a two-line “motto”:

Be strong and fixed on the destination,
But creative and flexible on the route.

Summary

Walpole, whether he knew it or not,
Told us how to get regular serendipity in his definition
Of the word.
“The ability,” he said
“through sagacity and good fortune
To find something good while looking for something else.”
Three requirements:

1. Sagacity (notice, watch, observe, be aware, learn, refuse to wear the blinders of obsession or self-consciousness).
2. The attitude of good fortune (see changes as opportunities, surprises as excitement, disappointments with silver linings).
3. Thoughtful goals (set and list objectives and pursue them until something else [better] is discovered).

Next Week

Next week, (next column) we will try to build on what we have learned about “regular serendipity” and move above it to the higher plane of “Spiritual Serendipity.” See you then.

Would you like to have a copy of the book on Serendipity of the Spirit that Richard wrote in Sri Lanka? Dozens requested one last week, and if there are a hundred or so more who want the book Richard may be able to arrange a half price deal for Meridian Readers. Drop him a quick e mail
(to Richard@meridianmagazine.com). The discussion of Serendipity will continue here in this column next week.

Richard continues to welcome your feedback and inputs. Write to him at Richard@meridianmagazine.com . If you missed any of the earlier columns in this series, you can go to the Deceivers Archive and the Alternatives Archive (see right sidebar) and catch up.

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