Stepping Back from the Busyness of Life
By Vickey Pahnke-Taylor

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There are people who have things fall through the cracks because of too many “To Do’s” — with no organized way of getting them all done. There are those who give little or no thought to any “To Do’s” —taking each moment as it comes. There are those so tied to a schedule — and the “To Do” list — that they can’t seem to take a breath of relaxed, “Let me enjoy this moment” air. I have lived each of these ways at some point during my life.

Somewhere along the way, I determined to find a happy medium. Flying by the seat of the pants is too economical a way for me to fly through life. Yet, it is not necessary to check off a long and detailed list of accomplishments — large or small — in order to feel like it has been a worthwhile day. I like to keep track, and I enjoy those check marks, but I am beginning to understand why my grandparents would enjoy simply sitting on the porch. All of you under the age of 30 — trust me, the idea of just sitting there for a while will one day sound like a great plan.

It is necessary for me to feel as though I have done something good every day. It is necessary to attack negative or burned out feelings. It is necessary to be as joyful as I am able— for my sake as well as the sake of those around me. When my days have too many things to do, it is harder to make peace within my very own soul.

Here’s a test: Right now, shrug your shoulders. Move your head from side to side. Are the muscles tense? Is the back ramrod straight and tight? Take a deep breath and let it all out. Let your mind wander for a moment or two.

My guess is that a number of us would feel that tightness in our neck and shoulders. We may feel as though we need to read this article quickly or skim over it, in order to get to the next thing we need to do.

While there are times when we must squash a bunch of “To Do’s” into a short amount of time, how about if we were to take a moment or two to simply celebrate the fact that we are alive? That we can read? That we can dream. Cramming every day with all those “To Do’s” leaves us less time to be.

In his wonderfully insightful book Way to Be, President Hinckley tells us: “The good things of which you dream in your better moments will become realities.” If we are always doing something, it leaves no time to dream! To simply be. I love President Hinckley’s words, and his counsel allows us more serenity in this often off-tilt world and greater self-mastery.

If your life seems a bit to heavy on the “To Do” side, here are a four questions to consider:

• How well do I know myself? Whether young, old, or in-between it is in our best interest to examine ourselves — warts and all. The earlier we take an honest look at ourselves, the earlier we may toss out the less important traits that characterize us.
  
  Only a teenager? (From time to time I have heard that lament from some of my children as they have navigated through these intriguing years, feeling overwhelmed with what is required of them). Although the teen years are full of potentially explosive exploring and intense self-awareness, it is so much more helpful to learn about who you are and who you wish to become now! Follow our prophet and focus on what we want to be more than what we want to do.
  
  
• How much do I love myself? I recently watched a show on television where individuals spoke of how they had, over the years, learned to love themselves. The turmoil of feeling like they were not good enough disrupted their personal growth earlier in life and robbed them of understanding of their inherent divinity. Tuning into that divine nature offers a healthy helping of what we should “be” about!
  
  
• How much do I know the Savior? Faith in Jesus Christ is the first principle of the gospel. We need to better know Him in order to grow that faith. We learn more about Him by reading His words, reading about Him, studying the words of those special witnesses of Him, and being more like Him.
  
  
• How much do I trust the Savior? There is great power and peace in learning to trust Him implicitly. Our lives somehow gain more balance and pure perspective when we lean upon Him. He has told us to “come unto me, all ye that labour and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.” (Matt.11:28.) He offers us rest from all of those “To Do’s” as well as all of the other things that sometimes weigh us down. We understand the importance of taking time to breathe deeply, enjoy the quiet moments, and listen for the quiet feelings that the Holy Ghost seems to whisper to us.

Most of us have lots to do in each day. Homework, housework, office work, Church work, family work, personal improvement work, extracurricular activities that require work. Lots to do. In all of our doing, it would do us good to pay attention to Elder Hugh Pinnock’s advice:

Do we fully realize that Jesus is to be the center of our lives? Only the Savior can be our Savior, and that relationship is always personal. We go to him alone. He accepts us that way only. (italics added.)

He is our friend. He encourages us to be like Him. That requires quiet time to ponder and reflect on the higher things of the kingdom.

There are many things required of us. I am not knocking good, hard work, or the reality that there are plenty of things to do. But, along the way, let’s sometimes be wise enough to clear the “To Do’s” if they take away the Spirit and our peace. Let’s not focus always on doing something — but just sit there!

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Vickey is a songwriter/producer, vocalist, and professional speaker, and has performed and/or taught in numerous venues. Her compositions include the theme songs for the Special Olympics program (state by state selection), the Make A Wish Foundation, the Especially For Youth program of the Church, and the Families In Focus program. She is a Billboard award winning songwriter, with hundreds of songs to her credit.

She has enjoyed participation in the Church Education System’s youth and family programs for almost two decades, having taught for Know Your Religion, Campus Education Week at BYU-Provo, BYU-Hawaii, and BYU- Idaho, Especially for Youth, Best of Especially for Youth, and BYU Conferences and Workshops.

Studying musical theater at BYU, she has used that learning experience in the music field as a way of enhancing the teaching of correct principles. Her latest gospel works include the collaborative projects "Women at the Well" with Kenneth Cope and "My Beloved Christ" with Randy Kartchner. Vickey has contributed to numerous EFY albums over the years and as a chapter contributor for many yearly EFY books; and as contributor the best selling LDS compilation, Sunshine for the Latter Day Saint Teenage Soul. She authored the book K.I.S.S.: Gospel Guidelines for Better Relationships for Bookcraft Publishing Company. For two years she was editor and columnist for "Gems for Youth" on the web at LDSWorld.com, formerly the Church’s electronic arm.

Vickey’s performance/teaching experience includes venues from participation with a nationally touring Repertory Theater Company to Symphony Halls to corporate conventions throughout the U.S. She has been commissioned to write scripts for the Faith & Values Channel; and created and directed the Bi-Centennial celebration for the Hampton Roads, Virginia area.

She holds a masters degree in interpersonal communications and currently resides in Salt Lake City, Utah. She is married to Dean Taylor and together they have eight children and two grandchildren.