Meridian Magazine :: Can Do Youth: All in the Family

All in the Family
By Vickey Pahnke-Taylor

“Help!” so many are crying out.

Children, adults, those never married and those divorced, those in stable homes and those whose homes are in turmoil, are seeing a shift in the world’s definition of “family.” Many are unsure of what to do about it, either in their own homes or by way of influencing the dark forces that are attacking the family.

In the very place where the sweetest and best memories are made, this laboratory is more in need of a greater heavenly presence than ever. There is so much good to enjoy! So much to learn! So much laughter to enjoy! So much beauty and peace in the Spirit to be felt!

We have to make room for those heavenly things. It seems that sometimes we get so busy with ‘the stuff of living’ that we neglect to make a place for the very essence of ‘the stuff of life’!

Here is an illustration:

One day a young son, just married, invited his father to visit him and his bride in their new home. The young son took the father from room to room and showed him the furnishings, and the paintings on the walls and so forth, and the father said, “This is lovely. I congratulate you, but Son, I have looked in vain for anything that indicates that you have a place here for God.

In writing about it later, the young man said, “I went through the rooms later, and I found that Father was right.

Let us go back to our homes and see whether the spirit of our homes is such that if an angel called, he would be pleased to remain.

(President David O. McKay)

The strength of family — whether the “standard” family of Mom, Dad, and children; a single person whose work associates are their family, a single parent with one or more children, those who assimilate into a part of the ward family, or one whose friends seem like family — is true and powerful. We all have the opportunity to grow in love, service and good memories by bringing the Spirit to that group whom we love best.

As we end this year and begin a new one, it seems a great time to ponder over the blessing of family, and figure out how to make things work even better as we progress through 2006.

From President Ezra Taft Benson, I offer his “tried and proven formula for successful families”:

Have love and respect for each family member. Each member knows he is loved and appreciated.
Cultivate an attribute of effective communication. Talk out problems, make plans together and cooperate toward common objectives.
Work together toward solutions instead of resorting to criticism and contention. Pray for each other and give encouragement.
Support each other.
Do things together.
Take deliberate steps to provide the best of wholesome influences. In this regard, most importantly, the scriptures are read and discussed.
Teach the blessings of understanding faith in God, repentance, baptism, and the gift of the Holy Ghost.
Prayer is a consistent practice.

President Benson’s formula may be used regardless of the nature of the group we call “family.” These suggestions increase our awareness of others around us and take the focus off of ourselves. They point us in the direction of Heaven and allow us, as the father pointed out to his son in the above story, to make a place for God.

Making a greater place for God will increase the joy factor in our families. The blessings, the learning curves, the strength and growth that bring us more success in our mortal journey are abundantly available to each of us. A greater family focus will strengthen our resolve to place “making a Life” above “making a living” — whatever that may mean to us individually. Relationships will become paramount. Love will grow. So will Christ-like attributes. Many of the most heavenly things come within our closest circle and may be right under our noses — it’s all in the family!