Having completed seventy years of life on this earth, having felt the love of a wonderful mother, having observed the lives of many exemplary women, having witnessed the poignancy of adoption, having experienced the miracle of music. . . and fifty years of marriage, I feel somewhat qualified to offer in song a senior citizen's view of the feelings of A Woman's Heart— the title of our latest album. I rarely pre-plan an album from beginning to end, but rather try to observe life and write about what is happening to me and to friends, neighbors and strangers with whom I am sharing life's journey. Then I try to capture the experiences in song, hoping I will strike a responsive chord with others who have had similar experiences. The album A Woman's Heart represents an accumulation of experiences from my own life as well as things I have witnessed in the lives of others.

My husband and I have traveled extensively throughout the United States during the last three decades, presenting stake music firesides and programs at Relief Society women's conferences, singles conferences and youth conferences. We have made warm and lasting friends while staying in their homes and have kept in touch with some of them through the years. Last year I received a request from a woman in Arkansas who was serving as stake Relief Society president when we spoke in her stake many years ago. They were planning a stake enrichment meeting and she asked if I would consider writing a theme song for the event— something about the different aspects of a woman's heart. I enjoy commissions so I gladly accepted the assignment and began thinking and praying for understanding on this intriguing subject. These are the words of the title song:

Every phrase in this song describes an aspect of my own mother's heart. “ Compassion flows within her very soul/It is her gift to comfort and console.” When my mother was dying in 1991 I was often in her home helping her in various ways. One afternoon when I was washing a few dishes I noticed ten shiny pennies sitting in the windowsill above her sink and asked mother if she would like me to put them away somewhere. From her recliner she answered, “No, just leave them there, they're my service pennies. They start out on the left side of the windowsill each morning and as I do acts of service for others I move them to the right side. I have to move all of them by the end of the day.” I knew my mother well enough to know that if she set such a goal she would have to reach it before the end of the day, but I told her I was curious to know how this would be possible since she was now confined to her bed or recliner. She said, “Well, I can only do smaller things now but I find a way. I can still write a note to a missionary, or call people in the ward who are ill, or crochet booties for new babies in the ward . . . .” She continued on with a whole list of things she could still do for others from her bed. Then I understood why she would sometimes ask me to roll her portable typewriter over by her bed so she could carefully move her legs off the side of her bed, sit up for a short time, and type in a few more names she had researched for temple work. “ A woman's heart can hold so many dreams/She sets her heart on true and sacred things”

“ And courage that can build another's faith/ Will find a place in a woman's heart.” Throughout her life my mother

was fearless about approaching others to share the gospel. She brought many people into the church in our little farming community in Vale, Oregon while serving as a stake missionary. I always marveled at her courage. She often said, “How can we know what we know and not share it with others—we have to!” She and Dad talked about the mission they would someday serve together when he was retired, but it was not to be. Dad had heart problems at an early age and eventually the cancer he had had as a young man returned to take his life one week short of his fifty-eighth birthday. Mother responded again with amazing courage saying, “I can either sit around and mourn for twenty years or I can get busy and see how much I can accomplish between now and when I am with your Dad again.” I was certain I knew which of those options she would choose. As a senior sister she served a full-time mission to Mississippi Jackson, again bringing many to the knowledge of the gospel. One day she wrote from her mission, “Today I met a wonderful young couple while tracting and they were very receptive to our message. I told him I had the impression that he would be a bishop in the church someday. He was amazed at that statement, but just you watch.” Some years later she received a call from this man who said, “Hello Sister Kapp . . . this is Bishop Stevens.” Mother also had a special love for our black brothers and sisters whom she met in Mississippi and many were baptized and remained faithful in the church due to her encouragement. She kept in contact with them to the end of her life. During the decade following her mission she researched and entered over forty thousand names for temple work. “ From sorrow she will learn that healing grace/Can find a place in a woman's heart”

Two years ago when Doug and I spoke at Southern Virginia University at their Education Week, I wrote a song to introduce my topic, ‘the miracle of music.' Scores of experiences where music had made a difference flooded back in memory as I pondered this subject.

“A mother croons a lullaby/The baby stops his crying” While speaking in Hawaii years ago we met a beautiful young Hawaiian couple who had recently adopted their first child, a handsome but profoundly handicapped little boy of about three. We were deeply touched as we watched them care for him. He was unable even to chew food so his adoring parents would chew his food for him and then transfer it to their son's mouth so he could receive the nutrients. The one thing this little boy could do perfectly, and almost constantly, was smile! A bright, happy and engaging smile. On the day before we were leaving, they called to ask if they might meet with us at a friend's home where we were staying. The boy fell asleep briefly while they were driving to the meeting place and when they awakened him to bring him in the house he was very cranky, as children often are when awakened prematurely from a nap, and he was crying loudly and inconsolably. The parents were distraught over his behavior though we assured them we understood. When all their efforts to quiet the boy had been exhausted, his father said, “Excuse me, I know what will help him,” and he went out to his car and brought in his guitar. With the boy still screaming unreasonably the father started strumming his guitar and he and his wife began singing, “ I'm Trying to Be Like Jesus”. In the exact moment when they began to sing, their son abruptly stopped crying and within seconds his bright wonderful smile had returned. I have seen music bring peace and calm to difficult situations many times before but never had I seen it work so dramatically. We proceeded to enjoy a lengthy visit with this special family and their happy son.

“A soothing strain can ease the pain/ Of one who's close to dying” In March of 1998 Doug and I went to the hospital here in Provo, Utah to see a dear Hispanic friend and neighbor, Jose Rubio, who was near death. He had been in a coma for a few days and his family was gathered at his bedside to watch with him. We had hoped to communicate with him one last time but had come too late. As we visited with his wife and family they asked if I would sing something to him, but I had brought no music with me. One family member produced a hymn book from her purse and it was decided that I would sing Soy un hijo de Dios (I Am a Child of God). Doug and I stood close to Jose's bedside and I held his hand with my right hand, and the hymnbook with my left, and began singing (as best I could with a lump in my throat). Our friend did not open his eyes, move, or awaken in any way but at certain places in the song he unmistakably squeezed my hand and I felt certain that he felt the impact of the words and was trying to communicate what he was feeling. Later in writing a song about this experience I expressed it this way: “ Then he peacefully slept, with no fear of death/ In the song God's voice was heard.”

Annually the church invites music submissions by aspiring composers in the church and it provides good incentive for those of us who seem to need a deadline to produce! The Relief Society also sponsors such an event, encouraging the women of the church to submit new music on themes of interest to women. With the 2007 deadline approaching, I began to think seriously about a subject that meant a lot to me and wrote text and music for My Mother's Love. It was a joy to later hear it nicely performed by a women's choir at the Assembly Hall on Temple Square , along with the winning music of other composers who had entered. On Mother's Day, 2008, I experienced one of the sweetest moments of my musical career as Doug and I sat in the Conference Center and heard the song gloriously performed by the Mormon Tabernacle Choir and Orchestra. I hope Mother was allowed to hear it too.

In 2004 an internet adoption agency asked me to write an album of songs on the different aspects of adoption. I asked my cousin Joy Lundberg to collaborate with me on the lyrics for this project because she would be writing from the perspective of having raised five adopted children. She wrote lyrics for fourteen of the songs and I for the other two which I have included on the album A Woman's Heart . The adoption album entitled, Do You Have a Little Love to Share and was recorded in 2005 and can be found on the website mentioned at the end of this article.

I have witnessed vicariously both the anguish of a young birth mother finding the courage to give her baby up for adoption, and the joy of a couple who have waited for many years for the great blessing now extended to them by the birth mother. In the song Empty Arms we hear the birth mother sing to her baby:

And the adoptive parents, feeling sincere empathy for her struggle, then sing:

The idea for the second adoption song came to me from a long-time friend, Mimi Larsen, who had been adopted as a child by a couple who already had natural children of their own. She had always been treated well by her adoptive parents but throughout her life there was one burning question in her heart that she never had the courage to ask:

Do You Love Me As Your Own? The resulting song poses her question and gives the answer I imagined her mother would have given, had she asked. Mimi was able to hear the song before she passed away in 2008.

Doug has occasionally asked me during the last ten years when I was going to write a love song for him. I have thought about it for two decades and at various times have attempted to write the lyrics—in fact, I have a whole notebook full of notes but nothing never seemed quite right, or quite good enough. I finally wrote a comic song entitled Couples which brought lots of knowing laughs from couples who heard me sing it at our firesides, but I could never seem to get the serious love song just right. A few weeks before our fiftieth wedding anniversary (September 24, 2008) I realized I needed to do it now! I looked at my voluminous notes, threw them all in the wastebasket, said a sincere prayer, and began to write from my heart as never before. I had tried so many times before but perhaps the song could only be written now from the perspective of our fifty years together. I wish I could have recorded it with my fifty-year-old voice because my seventy-year-old sounds, well. . . seventy! But I couldn't let anyone else sing it for him now could I!

I promise that the rest of the vocalists on the album, A Woman's Heart, are pros. And there are other songs on the album that were not mentioned in this article.

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You can find A Woman's Heart or any of the other almost 80 CD titles on sale for 50% off on our website during the month of December. Just go to www.JaniceKappPerry.com to order. IMPORTANT: The website will add product to the shopping cart at the regular retail price, but upon checkout there is a Promo Code box and you MUST enter the code 2008MEGASALE for the system to refigure the pricing to reflect the discounts. All product on our website is 50% off except for a few sheet music and cantata items produced by other publishers. Please forward this to anyone you think would be interested.